Heal my wounds
by BitchPleaseIamaunicorn
Summary: Éponine had an illusion of love, Enjolras didn't believe in love at all. But when Éponine needs a shoulder to cry on, he starts to have doubts about his beliefs. Modern AU.
1. Chapter 1

Bette Midler said; Some say love, it is a razor, that leaves your soul to bleed  
Some say love, it is a hunger, an endless, aching need.

Some people say Love isn't physical. People say it's all in your head. But the pain I feel right now, it isn't 'in my head'. I feel it. How can you feel something that isn't real? The pain I feel right now is indescribable, I can't breathe, it feels like somethings pushing down on my chest. It feels like something is crushing my heart.

Me and Marius had been dating for a year now, he was so nice to me. We meat on the first day of college, I had to save up to buy an apartment, and was lucky to have got an scholarship. It's not like my parent's would have paid for it. Mom wanted to help at the start, but once my father found out he went crazy on me. I felt bad leaving my mother and siblings. I had always been there to protect them when Dad came home drunk or got angry.

I wanted to surprise Marius with a movie night because he got a great grade on his mid-terms. He always left a key underneath his doormat so I let myself in. I could hear voices, I didn't know he had people over. Maybe it was the boys I thought.

Wait its two voices "that was great" that's Marius, who's he talking to in his bedroom? "yea! it was!" it was a girl. A high pitched giggly girl voice. I slowly walked into his bedroom and my jaw dropped to the floor. "Eponine!" Marius gasped. I looked over to the blonde slut covering herself with the bed sheet. "oh my god" I whispered I could feel the sting of tears pool in my eyes. "I..I cant believe this" I sobbed running out of the room. I could hear him calling after to me.

I ran out of the apartment not even closing the door, streams of tears rolled down my cheeks. He rushed out after in his boxers "Eponine! babe! she meant nothing, nothing like what I feel for you!" he tried to stroke my cheek but I slapped his hand away. "don't.. Don't you dare touch me!" I warned him. He looked down at the floor "you..you made me" he muttered.

he looked up, his eyes full of an emotion I couldn't understand "what?" I whispered, I didn't want to know what he meant by it, I needed to know. I guess I know now about the difference between wanting and needing. "You..you refused to sleep with me, I felt so worthless to you..Cosette she was nice to me, we had a few drinks and things got out of hand, ok?" he grabbed my hands. "but it didn't mean anything!" he pleaded. I got out of his hold.

"it was my fault?" I whispered. he began to deny what he said. "my fault?" I raised my voice as the anger in my stomach grew. "MY FAULT?!" I shouted, he flinched at my words "babe I didn't mean it like that!" he pleaded again. "I didn't refuse to sleep with you!" I shouted. "you..you know why I can't" I sobbed. "I know babe and I'm sorry, just give another chance! I'll make it up to you! I promise!" his eyes were filled with sadness and guilt.

I felt no remorse for him what so ever, this was his fault. I was angry, when anger mixes with sadness, its agony. "I hope your happy" I said, a tear rolling down my cheek. I started to leave " 'ponine!" he called after me. I kept walking. I wouldn't let him see me cry even more. "you'll be nothing without me!" he shouted angrily. I stopped a couple of feet from the lobby door. He was behind me, I turned around. My blood was literally boiling in my veins.

My breathing was heavy and my vision was getting fuzzy, looked up to him. all sadness and guilt were gone from his eyes and was replaced by vanity and smugness. I slapped him, so hard when I pulled away my hand stung. "ah! you bitch!" he shouted holding his cheek. I think nose was bleeding, I couldn't see. "you will be nothing, without me" I said hatefully, venom dripping from each word.

I walked out and held my head high, I walked back to my apartment, got in and sat down. And crumbled. I cried so hard, big gut wrenching sobs echoed through the apartment. The pain, the sadness, the hatred, the anger all filling my heart. He was the first person I loved. He was the first person to love me, I thought he loved me... I opened up to him, told him my secrets, laughed at his jokes, blushed at his compliments.

And now he has broken my heart into a million pieces. It feels like the world has ended, My life has turned into a bleak island where the sunlight never comes. I needed someone to talk to, and I knew the people I wanted to talk to and I knew where they would be. It's where they always are.

At the café.

_hello!_

_so yes, I kinda wrote a Les Mis fanfic.. _

_tell me what you think of it, and if I should carry on with it. Thanks for reading! Feel free to leave me a review I'd love to hear from y'all!_

_tata_

_unicorn x_


	2. Chapter 2

the sunlight was dimming over the roofs of the shops on high street. The street lights started to flicker on as I got to the café. It was old and the wooden window sills were rotting in the corners. I had a part-time job here, and met the boys. They stayed till the early hours of the night, just talking away. They let me into they're group, considered me a friend. And when I came from the family I had, I was very grateful for a friend or two.

I breathed in and opened the door, some turned to the bell that rung as I opened the door. I froze, the words I had chanted, trying to get my head around had vanished. "'Ponnie?" Courfeyrac stood up, his face etched with concern. "what's wrong?" he asked.

I broke down, I hadn't cried all the way over here and I thought I could be strong and not cry. But I did. Courfeyrac swiftly walked over and hugged me. "hey, whats this?" he asked softer. "shh come tell us" he cooed. I looked up into his brown eyes, "Maruis" I sniffed. "what about him" he asked even more worried, some of the boys had come behind him. "he..he" I stuttered "he slept with someone" I broke down again into Courfeyrac's arms.

"that bastard" I heard someone mutter. He broke the hug and held me at arm's length and sighed. "I'm so sorry Eponine" he said sympathetically. "come on, you need a drink" Grantaire said hooking his arm with mine. I refused to drink anything Grantaire gave me, I don't drink and God knows what he would put in my glass.

I explained what happened,taking cleansing breaths to stop from crying again. Courfeyrac squeezed my hand reassuringly "you deserve way better than him anyway 'ponine" he said, the boys nodding and agreeing with him.

"thanks guys" I sadly smiled. "can we change the subject now?" I chuckled. the group slowly started into different conversations, Courfeyrac, Prouvaire and Joly were in deep conversation about the state of today's society, a common conversation subject within the group. "you'll find a lovely man soon, with those looks" Grantaire winked slurring his words, the smell of whiskey wafted with his sentence.

"no" I sighed. "I'm done with love, it's a fools game" I said staring off into middle distance. "finally" Enjolras muttered behind his book. I glanced over at him, he was in his usual spot at the back of the group reading a book, it was either that or he would be having a 'heated conversation' with one of the boys. "excuse me?" I raised my eyebrow.

He sighed and placed his book down. "you fawned over boy who never really liked you back and he broke your heart." I shook his head. "love is an illusion, mind game you play on yourself" he stated."another pearl of wisdom from the Messiah himself!" Garantaire laughed, slapping Enjolras's back. Enjolras just rolled his eyes and got back to his book. I joined in on the conversation, trying to keep my head clear of thoughts.

It had started to get late and some of the boys had started to go home, Enjorlas had put his book down and had joined in on the groups discussion, it had turned to how rubbish popular music is now, Prouvaire being the hopeless romantic that he is making the point that those types of songs are wrote for people they love and admire."that's not right at all, most pop slash top 40 music is wrote for the artist and is normally mindless drivel that incises young people to buy for the record company's to make money off." I said raising my hand. "music isn't about expressing feelings anymore, its about making money" I sighed shrugging my shoulders.

"I got to agree with her, she makes a fair point." Enjorlas nodded in my direction. "thank you" I said, satisfied with my answer. I glanced at my watch, its was half past one. Jeez where does the time go? "I better be going, its late" getting up from my chair and pushing it in to the table. Joly and Courfeyrac both agreed and said their goodbyes. "are you walking home?" Enjorlas said looking past me, probably looking for my car. "no I walked" I said confused, this was quite out of character for him, normally he'd say a quick good-bye and get back to the discussion or to his books. "you shouldn't be walking" he admonished "I'll drive you" he grabbed his coat and walked towards me.

frankly I was still in shock, Enjorlas being helpful and caring. Was he ill or something? "you coming?" he asked, his eyes glinted with amusement as I stood there like an idiot. "oh um yes" I stumbled over the words trying to get them out in one breath. I followed him out, around into the small car park and got in the passenger side.

The ride was silent, but it wasn't an awkward silence. More of a comfortable silence. We got to my apartment block, I was just about to thank him for the ride when he blurted out "I'm glad you dumped him". I am so confused, what's up with him tonight? "I didn't say anything about dumping him" I muttered looking down at my hands. "what? after what he did to you? your still going to go back to him?" he sounded annoyed. "no..no I just I don't know..it was my fault" I said feeling even smaller.

"your fault?!" he said exasperated "how in the hell could Marius sleeping with another girl be your fault?" he asked. "it doesn't matter now, thanks for the ride" I got out before he could answer and swiftly made it in to my apartment complex. I got in and went straight to my bedroom, not even changing I got into bed.

I cried myself to sleep, like I did most nights. And fell in to a dark and cloudy sleep.

_ok chapter two yay! This took ages to write, I am the queen of __procrastination so I thought one video on you-tube and here we are three hours later..well thanks for reading, leave a comment if you liked it or didn't like it!_

_The thing I have to work on the most when it comes to my writing is not to describe so much because I feel it gets boring if I just write "we got out of the car..we walked along the path..we got to the door" etc etc etc, so If you do notice that in this story I am sorry and bare with me, I'll sort it out I promise!_


	3. Chapter 3

_"come here you little bitch!" I kicked him and jumped up and started to run, from the floor he grabbed my leg. I fell and my head painfully hit the floor. He grabbed my throat and swung his leg over me. "I'm going to teach you a lesson you won't forget"._

I bolted up in bed, with a cold bead of sweat ran down my face. It was the same dream that has haunted me for four years. I breathed in and out slowly, trying to slow my heartbeat. The bedside clock says 6:30 am, that's late enough for me to get up. I get changed out of yesterdays clothes and put on a clean t-shirt and some worn out jeans.

I can't stay stuffed up in here, I can feel the walls closing in on me. I grab my phone and I'm out the door. The streets are quiet with the odd car coming past. It's still a little chilly, but the rising sun keeps the wind at just a warm breeze. The only the place I can think is the park, it's only a minute walk from my apartment, and it will be quiet at this time.

I find a tree and sit underneath it, in the shade. I lean my head against the cool bark of the tree and exhale, the warm breeze plays through my hair which is in a pony tail. A smile comes to my lips as I watch the ducklings follow their mother out of the pond. I sigh and close my eyes.

"it is a small world after all" A familiar voice comes from above me. I peak open one of my eyes, Enjolras is leaning his shoulder against the tree with a apple in his hand. "hm I guess it is" I smile and close my eyes again. I feel him sit down next to me. "so why are you here so early then?" he asked. "couldn't sleep" I shrugged. "bad dream eh?" he said taking a bite out of his apple. "something like that" I mumbled.

We sat in a silence, I didn't want to talk. I'm scared if I talked I'd start crying again. "Look about last night" he started. "no don't worry about it, you were probably right anyway" I shrugged. "it didn't matter if you were right, it wasn't my place to say" his shook his head. "I'm sorry" I opened my eyes to look at him, his eyes were full an unknown emotion.

"thanks" I weakly smile at him. "so got any plans for today?" he asked nonchalant. I hadn't even thought of what to do, I had no classes today which was good, I don't think I could keep concentrated for a whole hourly feeling like this. "no, not really" I said staring off. "good, come on" he stood up and brushed himself off. "what?" I asked confused. "you need cheering up" he held out my hand. I grabbed it and pulled myself up. His hand felt big wrapped round mine, and it was warm.

"so where are we going?" I asked once I was on my feet, still holding his hand. "aah now that would be telling" he chuckled.

_finally! aha sorry its short but I wanted to get something up :D_

_comment if you liked it...or if you didn't ;)_


	4. Chapter 4

"ok now will you tell me where we're going?" I said clicking my seat belt in. "nope" Enjorals stated, turning on the engine. I huffed I hated not knowing things, "why?" I whined. He turned to look at me and smiled. "the element of surprise" he pulled out of the parking lot near the park and turned into the main road.

"what were you doing in the park anyway?" I wondered out loud. "I go for walks there most days" he shrugged. "oh cool" I looked out the window, the scenery was changing from the busy city into more of a sunburn location. "do have nightmares often" he asked concerned.

"no not really" I lied, he wouldn't want to know the dreams I have. No one would. "uh ok, you just seem a little out of it" he said keeping his eyes on the road. "um sorry it's ah early" I stuttered. You'd think I'd be a pro at lying by now.

"ok then" he chuckled. "we're nearly there". The scenery had changed completely, it was mostly greenery, tall trees arched over us making the sunlight patchy on the tarmac ahead. "wow it's pretty here" I said quietly. "yeah it is" he agreed. I still don't understand why he is being so nice, I need to ask him about that..well maybe not just ask him why he's being so nice, that would be quite rude.

Another 10 minutes driving Enjorals made me jump by cheerily saying "we're here!". The scenery hadn't changed, it was still a lot of foliage, trees and bushes. "we're here?" I said raising an eyebrow. "yeah we are" he smiled and got out of the car. I followed him out, and glanced round to where he had got off to. He had started walking up a narrow path amongst the bushes and trees. "come on!" He shouted over his shoulder. He is a peculiar man, I shook my head and followed him.

we had walked for about 15 minutes now, my feet were hurting and I kinda think we're lost because all the trees look the same now. "um Enjorals?" I said concerned. "yeah?" he asked over his shoulder. "are we lost?" I glanced round, I'm sure I've seen that tree somewhere. I heard him laugh, "me? lost? that's impossible, I know exactly where we're going" he said confidently. "whatever you say" I shrugged "I hope it doesn't take long, I mean I don't mind your ass in my face but the walking does get tiresome" I chuckled.

He stopped and put a hand in front of him gesturing me to go before him, I passed him his face was a bright red. "so I just follow the trail yeah?" I asked, the narrow path led up a hill, it wasn't very steep but the bright sunshine beating through the trees made it hotter and more humid.

I don't think I've ever seen Enjorlas embarrassed, or blush for that matter. Even though he did look cute with red dancing on his cheeks. I shook my head, I should be careful where my thoughts could take me. "so I just keep following the path yeah?" I asked. "yeah" he mumbled behind me.

The trail started to get narrow or narrower, and the sound of flowing water came into earshot. "can I hear water?" I turned around to him. He smiled and gestured me to keep going. The trail came to an end and the bushes thinned beneath us into grass. The grass then ended with the start of thin grey rocks, they made a semi-circle. In the middle of the circle there was a stream of water pouring into a lagoon or pond, one or the other.

It was breathtaking, it was something out of a movie or on a postcard. "wow" I gasped, "I know right" his smile was infectious. "I found this place when I was 10, I used to come here and" he sighed "think". I looked over him, he was staring down into the lagoon. Enjorlas never really talked about his background, all I knew was from the boys, he had grown up in a wealthy family, but he had left them not wanting to go into the families corporation. He now studies History, the same major as me. Even though I hadn't paid much attention to the fact he was there.

"my parent's used to take me up here, they'd sit and talk and I'd run off and explore" he chuckled, his eyes full of fondness. "so what happened?" I wondered, he glanced at me confused. "I mean with your family?" I added. "My father wanted me to go into the families business, but I didn't. I wanted to study, learn. there is so much we can learn from the past" he smiled, I agreed with him totally.

"so what about your family?" The whole mention of it made me tense up. "they didn't want me to go to college at all" I said. "why not?" he said concerned. I sighed, when I say family I meant my father, if he wasn't there they would have been happy for me to go. "they think it's no place for a women" he scoffed, "that's terrible" he said looking up at me.

"they are" I frowned.

**wheey new chapter! **

**Sorry about the wait but I didn't want to rush it, I'll try and set up some sort of pattern. Maybe Monday's for this and Thursday for My Hero, if you read that.. I'll work it out don't you worry!x**

**thanks for reading!**

**unicorn x**


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